I am 49 years old and have been married twice, have been attracted to women always but just ignored it to fit in. I have 3 kids, and about 3years ago I fell in love with a woman and had an affair, it changed me so much. For the first time in my life I felt normal, it was the most natural thing I have ever done. The affair happened and was over in 4 months, but I knew I wanted to have a woman in my life, perhaps to change my life totally and live a gay lifestyle. I love my husband so much and he is the kindest most loving person, this is so hard to do, to change and leave this man, but I know I will never be who I am unless I do. I am working on it a little at a time, to be able to go. I have told him how I feel about women, he does not understand what that will mean to him and me. I have told my kids who I am, and the possiblilty of me leaving their dad because of how I am. It is scary, and I only wish I had the courage to get on with it!!
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